June 2025 Museletter: Living with Intention - From Hamster Wheel to Purposeful Direction
Supporting you to free your mind so you can live from your heart!
“It is important to set intentions so we know who, how, and what to spend our time and energy on in life. When I don’t have clear intentions, I am like a hamster running on the treadmill of life and getting nowhere fast. When we bring our attention to our intentions and desires, the energy flows and we are more at peace and consciously making decisions on what to say yes and no to in life.”
– Peggy Steffens
One of the brain's many survival mechanisms is to live in vagueness. It protects us by telling the story, “I don’t know what I want.” Especially if we’ve had moments in life where we went after something we really wanted and didn’t get. That kind of heartbreak can make us stop wanting altogether, or pretend we don’t care.
I remember a distinct time in my late 20s when I was chasing the dream of fame and fortune as an actor in Los Angeles. I was taking half-hearted steps. Trying to get an agent. Showing up to casting workshops. Repeating affirmations that weren’t working. At the same time, I was drinking too much alcohol, under-eating, and living off of outside validation.
Unsurprisingly, I wasn’t getting what I wanted. I had the dream of landing a starring role in a sitcom. But it wasn’t happening, and eventually I gave up. I thought, F this and F goals. I’m not reaching them anyway, so what is the point. I sank even deeper into resignation and despair and told myself, “I’m not a goal person.” I saw myself as an intuitive, tortured artist and drifted deeper into coping mechanisms to numb the anxiety that came from two constant companions: self-judgment and fear.
I did experience a moment of grace where I saw that my inability to stop drinking was quietly wrecking everything I wanted to create. I found a group of people who helped me stop drinking one day at a time. What I didn’t realize then was that each sober day was a goal in itself. Each one was a step toward rebuilding integrity with myself.
So what do goals have to do with intentions? Goals are how we bring our intentions to life. Intentions are a purpose or aim that give our life meaning. Without intention, we’re just spinning, like that hamster on the wheel Peggy describes. That was me for a long time.
One reason those acting goals never came to life is because they weren’t rooted in an authentic intention for me. This path was not putting my energy where it could do the greatest good and create the deepest impact for the benefit of others. It was born from a hunger for external validation, from trying to prove I was enough. And when goals come from that place, they often don’t happen. Or if they do, they feel empty. Because they’re chasing a sense of worth that can’t be filled from the outside. And if you are on one of these paths leading to nowhere right now, it's totally normal, and part of your process. AND, you don't have to stay there. We learn from the "failures", the paths and goals that don't happen just as much as from our successes.
When I finally learned how to live in conscious intention, I started to understand why it matters. It matters because what we do not make conscious runs the show so to speak. When I took the time to get clear on what my most cherished intentions were, my life felt more authentic and useful. I stopped wasting years drifting in distraction, denial, and resignation.
Intentions are powerful energetic channels. They help us focus. They guide us like bumper lanes in bowling, keeping the momentum moving toward the pins aka goals, instead of flying straight into the gutter. Here's to you getting strikes in the different frames of your life!
Step by Step,
Jessie
